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Milk and Oranges

“Where are my oranges and my milk?” my husband, Sam, asks.

Sam had just come home from the grocery store and was unloading the bags. Agitated because some of his purchases were missing, he was looking for them by scrambling through grocery bags, upsetting things in the refrigerator, and finally moving items around in the car–all to no avail.

“Are you sure you bought them?” I ask. “Where’s the bill?”

He handed me the receipt.

“Yeah, you paid for them,” I say. “You probably left them on the cart again.”

“You go back and get them; you’re better at it than I am,” he says, as he handed me the bill and the car keys.

Are you and your spouse having these kinds of conversations daily? Or are you having this one with your kids? “Mom, you told me that story already. What’s wrong with you?”

Then you must be over 60. These are the years when the wires in the computer in your head are getting rusty, and you begin to wonder if you could be getting Alzheimer’s or dementia.

You’ve been going religiously to a stretch class, walking around the block every day, eating those damn fruits and vegetables, and taking handfuls of vitamins. You’ve been putting up with backaches, sore knees, and sugar cravings just to keep your body young. Now it dawns on you: a young body is no good if it has no mind!

“Are you going?” Sam asks.

Out the door you go. On the way to the grocery store you decide to stop at the bookstore. When you get there, you stand in the middle of the store bewildered. The clerk asks, “May I help you?”

You look at her with a blank stare. Your mind goes through the alphabet, desperately seeking a book title. Suddenly, it dawns on you. You are almost embarrassed to tell the clerk you are looking for a book to improve your mind.

You walk out of the store euphoric. In your hands is a book that will help you keep your mind young. You look around and think, “If only I could find the car, my day would be great.”

Your cell phone rings. It’s your best friend. She has just seen a great movie and she is busy telling you about it. When you ask her the name of the movie, there is silence. Finally, she answers, “I don’t remember.”

You refrain from saying, “You just saw it last night.” Instead you say, “I’m so glad you are my friend.”

You get in the car, and with a smile on your face, you drive home. You walk into the house. Your husband rushes over to you, and has only one thing to ask:
“Where’s the milk and oranges?”

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